Yes, Mistress Breda. I Will Obey.

If Breda can do this, so can I. 

Here’s the meme.  100 things.  Bold the ones you’ve done.  The snarky comments are optional. 


1. Started your own blog. – No… never done that.  DUR.
Slept under the stars. – It’s not romantic, it sucks.  Give me a tent any day!
Played in a band. – My name is Dante, and I was in Band.
4. Visited Hawaii. – and don’t really want to.
Watched a meteor shower.  – Way cool
Given more than you can afford to charity. – Guilty.  “But you are a heartless Conservative? How can that be?”  Bite me.
7. Been to Disneyland.- Again, no desire to go there. 
8. Climbed a mountain. – This I would love to do.
Held a praying mantis. – When I was a wee tot
Sang a solo. – May name is Dante, and I was in College musicals.
11. Bungee jumped. – I’ll just leave Breda’s comment: (oh HELL no)
12. Visited Paris.- Meh, may someday on my way to Spain or Italy
Watched a lightning storm at sea.– Texaribean Cruise trying to outrun a bad storm.  COOLNESS!
Taught yourself an art from scratch.– I ain’t tellin’.  *evilgrin*
15. Adopted a child.
Had food poisoning. –  Oh yes.  Too many times
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty. – For that, I’d have to go to NY.  *shudder*
Grown your own vegetables. – Yes.  Success has been… inconsistent.
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France.- But I saw “Moaning Lisa” at a small theater down town.  JK.
Slept on an  train. – Was tired and slept on the Zoo train in Houston.  HEY!  IT COUNTS!
Had a pillow fight. – You are a heartless commie if you don’t have this one.
22. Hitch hiked. – Um… no.  Bad idea all around with that one..
Taken a sick day when you’re not ill. – Unless my employer is reading this.  In that case… NO!!! I’m just trying to be one of the cool kids and say yes!
24. Built a snow fort. – We don’t have snow here as a rule.  And when we do, it’s no where near the volume to build even a GI JOE fort.
Held a lamb.– Um… parts of a lamb… to about medium doneness… Does that count?  Actually, I did hold one at a petting zoo. 
26. Gone skinny dipping.  – No one wants to see that.  Trust me.
27. Run a Marathon.-  HAHAHAHAHAHAH!
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice.-
Seen a total eclipse. – kinda underwhelmed.  I guess when you don’t thing the god’s are warring over the sky, it loses its magic.
Watched a sunrise or sunset. – Both
Hit a home run. –  Yes, but only due to the utter incompetence of the opposing team at recess.
Been on a cruise. – Deep water.  AH!  So much real estate to dispose of the bodies!
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors. – I like food, so some day Spain.  I like food, so England is out!
35. Seen an Amish community. – I s’pose Weird Al’s “Amish Paradise” doesn’t count?
Taught yourself a new language. – YES!  PROGRAMMING COUNTS!
Had enough money to be truly satisfied. – Well, yeah.  I eat 3 square and can pay the bills.  More is always nice, but… yeah, satisfied, I’ve been. 
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person.
39. Gone rock (wall) climbing.  – Again, would love to.
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David.- some day
Sung karaoke. – Don’t.  Just… don’t.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt. –  They left off the, “in person,” but I’m assuming it.
Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant. – Yeah… We conservatives are all heartless bastards.
44. Visited Africa. – Met someone named Africaand visited with her.  But again, I don’t think that’s what they ment. 
Walked on a beach by moonlight.– On the Texas Gulf Coast, that’s the only way.  Ick.
Been transported in an ambulance.  – Blazer v. LTD (not Crown Vic).  I was in the LTD.  I lost.
47. Had your portrait  drawn. – I’m not that patient
48. Gone deep sea fishing. – Why ruin a perfectly good outing.
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person. – high on the list.
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.
Gone scuba diving or snorkeling. – Love to snorkel.  Can’t swim in fresh water, but can snorkel like the devil in open ocean.
Kissed in the rain.
53. Played in the mud.  – Total Commie if you haven’t
Gone to a drive-in theater. – Answered the question of, “Wonder why these things are almost all gone?”
55. Been in a movie. – I needed money for college.  I’m not proud of it so I don’t count it. JK.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China. – When something approaching democracy rears its head there (or when the counquer us), I’ll go see it.
57. Started a business. – Almost. 
Taken a martial arts class. –several actually.
59. Visited Russia.
60. Served at a soup kitchen. – I don’t think I have. 
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies.
62. Gone whale watching. –
Got flowers for no reason. – still don’t know why.
Donated blood, platelets or plasma. – all three. 
65. Gone sky diving. – What part of “NO!” don’t you get? 
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp. – I don’t think I could handle that.

67. Bounced a check. – And I didn’t even keep a record until my wife made me when we got married.

68. Flown in a helicopter.

69. Saved a favorite childhood toy. – Toy Soldiers.  There’s a story there. Maybe some day I’ll tell it.

70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial.

71. Eaten Caviar.– Drooooollll

72. Pieced a quilt. – Have the stuff.  Was supposed to help my wife.  We never started.

73. Stood in Times Square. – What is with the NY Fetish?

74. Toured the Everglades. – Stagnant water.  Gators.  Mosquitos.  Yum.

75. Been fired from a job. – Laid off cause the place folded, but never fired. 

76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London. – it doesn’t say, “in person” but, again, I’m going to assume.

77. Broken a bone.  – Amazingly, no?  I am now designated Murphy Bait!

78. Been on a speeding motorcycle. – Not my thing.  I like mass between me and the things I’m gonna hit.

79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person.– There are bigger holes in DC. *rimshot*

80. Published a book. – Someday I hope to.

81. Visited the Vatican. – Would be a dream come true.

82. Bought a brand new car. – Never again.  Dave Ramsey has converted me.

83. Walked in Jerusalem. 

84. Had your picture in the newspaper. – In an alter boy vestments, no less!

85. Read the entire Bible. – 8 years of Catholic School and 4 years of Catholic University.  Yeah, I’ve read the whole thing. Even the boring parts.  Probably more than once. 

86. Visited the White House.

87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating.  No… Strangely enough.  I’ll have to work on that.  HERE KITTY, KITTY, KITTY!

88. Had chickenpox. – I still have a special place in my heart for the smell of Phenolated Calamine Lotion.

89. Saved someone’s life. – I haven’t killed some that deserved it. That should count.

90. Sat on a jury. – Idiot Prosecutor didn’t establish jurisdiction. 

91. Met someone famous. – A few.

92. Joined a book club. – Clubs should have spikes though them; not people in them 

93. Lost a loved one. – Yes.

94. Had a baby. – Is this one here so no man can score 100%?  Why can’t we have one no woman would do like, “Ignited your own flatulence,” or “Laughed at The Three Stooges.”

95. Seen the Alamo in person. – Lame.  I’m from Texas. I can say that.

96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake.

97. Been involved in a law suit. – Stupid.

98. Owned a cell phone.– I have lusted in my heart for an iPhone.  Now as long as I don’t get attacked by a bunny while fishing… (you are a serious political wonk if you get that one.)

99. Been stung by a bee. – YES!  And have a nasty phobia now, that you very much!

100. Read an entire book in one day. – And no, it was not, “Great Moderates in Human History.”


Now I pass the baton.  Your Turn.


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Conservative, educated, understands history, distrusts government, distrusts politicians, dislikes pop-culture, and carries a firearm. In short, I'm what The Framers of The Constitution were counting on and everything your government wants you to fear most.

The only thing I don’t have to complain about is some GI taking up space in my living room. I’ll let you know about the Civil Courts if someone ever owes more than $20 to me. ---If you didn’t get that one; sue your Civics or US History Teacher.

Your shortcut to Acute Dyspepsia
Any Spelling, Grammatical, or Typographic errors are the result of my keyboard, public school Elementary education, or Secret Government Ninjas and not fault of the author and his flying through his posts at lunch time. If you see any errors, ping me and I will correct them. Ping me often enough, and I will make you my editor.
dantes firing range -A T-
Remove the spaces and convert the -AT- to... you know the drill. In VB Script that's: Value = replace (replace ("dantes firing range -A T-", " ",""), "-AT-", chr(64))

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