Christmas For Dummies.

So a few years ago (about a millennia and a half give or take), some really wise old priest decided it really sucked trying to honor Jesus’ birth right around the same time as he was murdered.  Granted the rising from the dead shtick did put a happier spin on the whole, “I killed my savior,” thing, but still… Dead God does not equal happy birthday. 

So this priest looked about and saw all these Pagans randying about having a merry old time and he though, “You know, why don’t we co-opt this holiday too.  I mean we get to kill 2 birds with one stone.  We get to give the locals a reason to celebrate with us and we get rid of the whole Debbie-Downer of ‘happy birthday now please get up on the cross’ (and depending on when the vernal equinox fell you might have ‘come down off the cross, we have some nice cake for you’). 

So Pagans became Christians and life went along for hundreds of years pretty much unchanged.  You had various permutations of the same theme but nothing really earth shattering.  Then the Christian world had several disciplines coalesce into one unstoppable force.  Psychology, Economics, Banking, and Industry, just to name a few, formed a new prophet called, “Marketing,”  and that prophet cried out in the desert and announced the birth of a new religion, “Consumerism!” 

Consumerism looked at the world and said, “Look at all the people celebrating Christmas!  Why, we need to co-opt that holiday and kill two birds with one stone.  We’ll put them further in debt by convincing them they deserve all these things we sell and we’ll drive out any sad vestiges of the old religion that makes them think stupid things like saving money and personal accountability!” 

So thus Consumerism spoke to his prophet, Marketing, and said, “Bring them to me.  Inflame their hearts with want and need so that I can fill the hole with my ephemeral trinkets. …At least until our products for next season are ready.”  And Marketing did his bidding.  And people fought for toys that would be in next year’s garage sale and spent the entire Christmas season miserable and angry. 

The angels turned to Jesus and cried, “Are you going to stand for this!”  To which Jesus replied, “Come on!  They nailed me to a cross, did you think it was going to be all down hill after that,” and he went back to watching kids playing.   

The angels stared in total puzzlement until Jesus said, “Look.  They’ll be back.  They can’t live in this ponzi fantasy forever.  Things will collapse and they’ll be back.  At least until someone else builds the next false god.  You really should be used to this by now.”

So the seasons turn from one shopping excuse to another.  People try to show off what they haven’t got and kids tear from one present to the next like a glutton suffocating on any food in his reach.  The night falls and the people cry, “I’m so glad that’s over!  Thank GOD we have another year before we have to do that again!” 

But as their hind brain counts the costs and inescapable math mounts, their fears become harder and harder to ignore.  Next year may NOT come.  At least not this way.  And that part of the brain which made lighting fast the flash of claws or the thundering of a run for life itself gnaws and worries at the modern intellect.  Can another video game quell the pain?  Can bigger TV or a faster CPU keep me safe?  Can the right mix of pill make it all go away?

To any left who know that Christmas starts TODAY and not on Black Friday; Merry Christmas and God Bless. 

To all those who simply must have the season’s latest toy’s and think it’s finally over now and all you have to do is find a way to pay for it; good luck and I leave you with one thought.  When… Not if… When… When all the toys you preen with such vainglory over lose their luster….  When they stop blinking and boinging or going, what will be important about today? 

Look into the eyes of everyone you see.  Everyone!  And try to realize the only lesson you need ever know about the holidays.  Christmas, indeed any great time, isn’t about giving. It isn’t about receiving.  It’s about being.  Being who you are, where you are, with all who make you what you are.  Master that, and Citibank and Madison Ave. need never steal another precious moment again. 

… And to all, a good night.

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Dante…

Conservative, educated, understands history, distrusts government, distrusts politicians, dislikes pop-culture, and carries a firearm. In short, I'm what The Framers of The Constitution were counting on and everything your government wants you to fear most.

The only thing I don’t have to complain about is some GI taking up space in my living room. I’ll let you know about the Civil Courts if someone ever owes more than $20 to me. ---If you didn’t get that one; sue your Civics or US History Teacher.


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