Archive for the 'Humor' Category

Where’s Your Gaia NOW!

Bring me cases of Aqua Net and Freon.  I’ll fix it.

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Ah, SHOT show time…

…time for all the gun bloggers to pile on the hate.  It’s a wonder that so many guns get sold in this country since every single one of them seems to suck so much.

After Action Report: Feral Hogs. Or… “How I owe my Guardian Angel a drink”

You know the old adage, “God protects fools and little children.”  If given that premise on a standardized test and were then asked,

“God will protect Dante because he is: 

a) A Fool
b) A child
c) all of the above?”

How should you answer?

Let me give you a hint, I passed the Age of Majority a good while ago.  Well… At least physically.  Continue reading ‘After Action Report: Feral Hogs. Or… “How I owe my Guardian Angel a drink”’

Bullets, Targets, And Salvation

Tam posted this and my twisted little brain got to thinking.  She talks about speed being THE factor in a “flat shooting” bullet.  Then there is a footnote about the Ballistic Coefficient.  But really, when you dig at it, the BC is just the measure of how well a bullet doesn’t let the atmosphere slow it down.  So it really is just the speed of the bullet.  But then again, if the bullet IS less prone to slow down, using the BC is important. 

That led my grey matter to Faith and Good Works.  Yes, I know.  I do make shrinks facepalm.  I mean, Faith without Good Works is dead, but Faith should, by its very nature produce Good Works.

So it’s all how you look at things.  If you take the point of view of the target* with a nice lead smudge on it’s surface, the bullet needed to go X fps from the point of origin at its point of aim to impact on the target’s surface.  So the target only cared (cares) about the total Speed (Big “S”-Speed).  In other words, a Speed (Big “S”) that was (is) in motion.

But from the shooter’s point of view, (s)he needs to know what to do to make that happen?  You need a bullet with a known flight path so you can say, “if I aim here, it will impact over here.”  You need to know both the speed (Little “s”-speed) that the bullet will be moving and the BC of your bullet.**  The speed (Little “s”) is simply a measure of potential at this point. 

“Faith” and “Faith and Good Works” work much the same way.  From the point of view of the target***, you needed to be moving at X Fps (Faith per second), to make it to the bull’s-eye.  From this side of the equation, Faith (Big “F”-Faith) is a moving idea, it’s alive.  It’s completed or completing.  It’s either missing the target or hitting it safely.

Shift the focus from the target to the shooter, I mean Christian… nah, I think shooter works.  Anyway, shift the focus and you look at the equation in static form, “What do I need to get there?” And in this case, you see Faith (Big “F”), much like Speed (Big “S”), needs to be broken down into its component parts of faith (we’ll call it little “f”-faith) and good works.  On this side, it’s not alive yet, we haven’t pulled the trigger. 

On our side of the equation, the human side that struggles with the HOWs, you need both faith (little “f”) and good works.  One enables the other like a bullet in flight.  Have a lousy BC (don’t do good works) and you will fall faster than a flat nosed .45-70.  Have a better BC and you will be “flatter shooting” and more able to deal with the vicissitudes of the life’s atmosphere.  This all assumes that you’ve pulled the trigger in the first place and have any faith.  All the fancy schmancy techno-wonder projectiles are worthless if they stay in the chamber safely incased in brass.

On God’s side of the equal sign, the side where everything happens all at once, He just sees Faith (Big “F”), and all the good works done without it don’t add up to anything.  Even the acts that are done with faith don’t really help us cause you should have been doing them anyway.  You want an extra cookie for doing what you were supposed to do?  

So, Lutherans and Catholics rejoice!  The centuries old feud can be put behind us****.  Ah, guns!  Is there nothing they can’t solve?

* Let’s say a steel plate at 100 yards
**if all other things are equal. Not going to get into burn rates, powder loads, windage, et cetera… all of which, BTW, shows just how tiresome the faith v. faith and good works argument can get when we should all just be going out for a beer and helping little old ladies across the street, but I digress.
*** in this case, the eternal NOW with clouds and harps instead of the hear-after with Uwe Boll screenings and Justin Bieber muzak playing in the hallways.
**** Ok, maybe there are other things to deal with, but wouldn’t you rather just go shoot some targets then have a beer? We can leave all that other stuff for when the alcohol kicks in.

T! S! A! T! S! A! Cheer On Security Kabuki

A New Hope and a Modest Proposal.

Concealment Tip

If you are thinking of being TRULY secret squirrel about concealing your carry piece, it’s probably a good idea to NOT do all of the following:

a)     Wear a bright t-shirt with a bold Pro-2a statement

b)     Wear your NRA hat

c)     Wear your TSRA pin on you NRA hat.

You see, people will see those telltales and then some of us, well at least those of us not floating about totally in condition white, will kinda put two and two together and figure that bulge on your strong side under your cover shirt ain’t your cell phone.

Why, oh why, won’t Texas end this farce and just vote in open carry.  Oh that’s right… the other 90% of the people who didn’t notice that guy’s piece would probably fudge their huggies and die of acute hyperbolic dyspepsia at the mere sight of a firearm not strapped to the side of a guy wearing a badge of some sort.*

*BTW, a sewn on security guard badge DOSE NOT confer upon its bearer “teh awesome” and imbue him with the gift of stellar pistoleroship.  …Or even common sense.    

P.J… Like A Usefull George Will. …Only Funny

…And without all that Chicago Cubs baggage.

For your giggle box’s pleasure.   Although our Ninja and Zombie policies may be a good time/energy sink for them as well.


Dante…

Conservative, educated, understands history, distrusts government, distrusts politicians, dislikes pop-culture, and carries a firearm. In short, I'm what The Framers of The Constitution were counting on and everything your government wants you to fear most.

The only thing I don’t have to complain about is some GI taking up space in my living room. I’ll let you know about the Civil Courts if someone ever owes more than $20 to me. ---If you didn’t get that one; sue your Civics or US History Teacher.


Your shortcut to Acute Dyspepsia
Any Spelling, Grammatical, or Typographic errors are the result of my keyboard, public school Elementary education, or Secret Government Ninjas and not fault of the author and his flying through his posts at lunch time. If you see any errors, ping me and I will correct them. Ping me often enough, and I will make you my editor.
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Remove the spaces and convert the -AT- to... you know the drill. In VB Script that's: Value = replace (replace ("dantes firing range -A T- hotmail.com", " ",""), "-AT-", chr(64))

For The Record